“Before I was afflicted I went astray, but now I keep your word.” Psalm 119:67 ESV
This devotion is a tad different from my usual meditations in that I want to share a bit with you, my readers, about the way God has been working in me.
A little over a year ago, God started pruning several areas of my life. The opportunities to teach writers’ workshops ground to a halt. My publisher went belly-up. The mystery novel on which I was working required some major corrections and edits that proved overwhelming in my weighed-down state of mind.
At first, I was upset. Then I grew angry—with my publisher, with other influential individuals, with myself, but most of all, I grew angry with God. Like a house on stilts, I watched the swells rise. One by one, those stilts weakened and failed, leaving me floundering in deep waters.
The thing is, God loves us too much to let us stray from His calling upon our lives. At times, he has to correct us in order to redirect our vision to align with His, which sometimes requires some hard and painful lessons. “Don’t let the fact that it’s hard and painful blind you from the big gain: these moments are sanctifying and good for our souls” (Joel Muddamalle, The Hidden Peace: Finding True Security, Strength, and Confidence Through Humility).
As I pondered what God was doing in my life, I heard His tender, loving voice say, “You’ve been chasing success. What I want of you is to pursue significance. The significance that comes in furthering the Kingdom of God.” His desire is for me to faithfully sow the seeds, one at a time, and that requires humility and a servant’s heart.
I am so thankful God is patient with me. Like the Psalmist, I can say, “My troubles turned out all for the best – they forced me to learn from your textbook” (Psalm 119:71, The Message). While I was looking for a bountiful harvest, He was correcting me, reminding me that the harvest is His. What I need to keep my focus on is bending my back to the fields before me and faithfully planting the seeds.